When You Think Your Car Is 'All That'

After driving around aimlessly for hours in a crowded parking lot looking for a parking spot, I got rushes of adrenaline when I finally found an open space.  You know the feeling—Oh, JOY!!

But as you can see, I’m not even close to being in line with the car next to me.  Why?  Because someone thought their car deserved two spaces all to itself!  They were parked crooked, too.  So even though I made an attempt to wedge in there, I just couldn’t make it.

Sooooooo, now I’m not a happy camper because this was clearly uncalled for and I’m tired of driving around in circles for a parking space.

I don’t know why people insist on making me reach into my glove box for my pad of yellow parking tickets.  Oh, trust me, I’m not leaving until one of these is plastered onto their windshield.  I don’t have ANY problem standing behind their car while I fill out the paperwork.

And I DO take the time to fill out all the necessary blocks of information—the time of violation, the make, model, and license number of said car—just so there’s no mistaking who I’m clearly irritated with!!

I know it freaks people out as they’re walking to their cars and can see a yellow ticket face-down on their windshields—or even better—as they’re starting to drive off.  Then to have to pull over and pull it off.  (Insert evil laugh here.)

So if you see one of these yellow bad boys on your car windshield under the wiper blade, YEAH, IT WAS ME!!!  If I had to resort to these measures, you can believe I was ticked off with your lack of regard for other drivers—like your car is SO special!!

So, if you have nothing else to do today, let’s see if we can’t try to keep our cars within the lines of the one space we’re allotted per vehicle, shall we?

Take-Away Life Lesson:  It’s not much different from coloring within the lines when you were a child, people.

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67 thoughts on “When You Think Your Car Is 'All That'

  1. That’s so funny! I would have gotten one of those the other day from you. I can not park my hubby’s pickup for anything in between two other cars. I miss my little car. I can park those. 🙂

  2. I REALLY need to do this too! Much better way than keeping all the frustration and anger at those crazy drivers inside of you which is what I do! Haha

  3. OM_G!! You are such a riot!!!! Made my morning!!!

    But… You can’t say anything… When I was young and full of piss and vinegar, I also was aggravated by how someone had parked just like you on a hot day. As I came out of the supermarket, I just happened to have conveniently bought a dozen eggs. Well, oops… One cracked open, unfortunately, right on the cowl opening at the base of their windshield… By the way, that’s the opening through which “fresh air” is taken into the passenger compartment. I’m sure they loved the smell of rotten eggs over the next couple of days…

  4. I like to say sarcasm is a beautiful choice of weaponry against idiots. Lol. My friend used to write “tickets” to people who couldn’t stop staring. Lol. We were in high school of course but this comes to mind, after reading your entry. This is darn hilarious. When did you come up with the idea?

    1. I didn’t really come up with it. I saw these while browsing through a catalog I had and ordered them from the company because I thought “Wow, I could sure use those.” And darned if I didn’t.

  5. You have done well….lol. I used to do the same thing a few years ago. I am disabled now, but it reminds me to do it again for those that abuse the handicap spots that I need. My original “Ticket” was a sheet of paper with an “disgusting Ogre” and much harsher verbal abasement. I’m sure they got the point. Most abused & double parked spaces are usually always in shopping areas and not important private lots. Some do it on purpose so that their “new car” won’t be hit by car doors parked next to their “idolized vehicle.” Keep up the good work…and for your info….the original quote concerning the camel statement was not armpits….but crotch…lol. Thanks for the reminder. Emery

  6. OK, this made me laugh. Thanks for that! My concern though is that there just might be a good reason for the poor parking. I live in a community with many retired folks and let me tell you, they insist on driving their huge cars and parking willy nilly! Personally, I’m a stickler about parking and rarely do I not park properly. But I remember one time when I did (against my nature) because I was panicked about getting to my kid! It would have been another blow if I came back to my car to find I had been ticketed. If only there was a way to *know* if the parking was someone’s exception, instead of the rule which is that very inconsiderate people constantly get away with parking in a way that is selfish and discourteous. Thanks a lot for this post, made me laugh and think. May your week be filled with lovely parking 🙂

    1. I would probably also be shy to put out such a ticket, because there might have been some extenuating circumstance which made the lousy parking the best of possible alternatives at the time. (The simplest example, for instance, would be that there were a couple cars overlapping the adjacent spots, and this driver had to make do with the only space on hand.)

      On the other hand, if there were good reasons for the lousy job, the driver would probably come back, roll her eyes at the ticket, and maybe grumble about the circumstances which led to it, and probably not take it personally.

      1. Thanks for connecting, Joseph. I checked out your blog and really enjoyed my time there. I look forward to sharing it with my son, who is more interested in numbers than words 🙂

      1. One incident I remember was when there was someone whose face I haven’t seen to date started parking his motorbike in my car park. Two days I let go and just got the lazy security guy to pull the bike away. But on the third day I couldn’t take it anymore. I fumbled in my bag and found my black eye pencil. I made a big black cross on the rear view mirror with it and that was the last i ever saw of the bike. I think he or she got the lesson. Felt bad but someone has got to teach them , Right ?

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