The Nastiest Nutrition Bar I’ve Ever Had

Posted on by LFFL

Nutrition bar

O–M–G!  Bless my mom’s sweet heart for trying to lead me on a healthy path—but WHAT-IN-THE-SAM-HILL!!!

So my mom stopped by my job on her way to work and gave me some grapes and a nutrition bar to snack on while I whittled the rest of the day working away.  Fabulous.  The more food in my possession, the merrier, I say.

Now—she’s given me nutrition bars before and they’re pretty edible.  I’ve even had some really fantastic ones that I’ve loved and then some that are just “ok.”  Because you know, after all, nutrition bars aren’t always the best tasting things—it just depends.

So I open this package and the first thing I notice is—WOAH!  Never seen a black nutrition bar before—so I obviously had my concerns.  I proceeded to sniff away at it and could slightly smell apple & cinnamon and then another odd smell I couldn’t quite make out.

So I bit into it thinking I’m just psyching myself out again like always when introduced to a new nutrition bar and this would be just like any other nutrition bar—you know, like when you think you’re not going to like it very much but then discover it’s pretty edible after all even though it’s not your favorite thing to eat in the world?

Well, low and behold, that bite was inside my mouth and when I got to the 2nd & 3rd chew I’m like—WHAT FRESH HELL IS THIS I’M TRAPPED INSIDE OF?! 

Nutrition bar ingredients

I’m not really sure if my mom was trying to provide me a more nutritious and healthier lifestyle—or if she really had it in for me because “BLECH” isn’t even coming close to a strong enough term for that taste.  I didn’t have a clue almighty what was going on!

While the entire inside of my mouth was begging for mercy at my desk, all I could think while that beast of a bite was inside there was, “OMG!  Did I wrong my mom in some way this past week that I don’t remember?  Why is she doing this to me?!!!

After my mouth went into convulsions, I had to read the package to see what in the dickens I just bit into—and NO WONDER!  If there’s any doubt these ingredients are actually inside this bar—I’m here to tell you they definitely are!

Inside this all organic Apple Cinnamon Crunch Super Food Bar is—sprouted buckwheat, spirulina, algae, blue-green algae, chlorella broken-cell algae, barley grass, alfalfa grass, wheat grass, purple dulse seaweed, rose hips, palm fruit, lemon & orange peel, beet root, spinach leaf, raw almonds, almond butter, walnuts, sunflower seeds, and cinnamon.

The only thing I could taste was algae and grass.  My mistake was I should have looked over the ingredient list first before biting into it.  I admire anyone that can eat one of these things because I couldn’t get past that first bite.

So BIG UPS to my mom for the bravery she clearly has to get through one of these things.

So if you have nothing else to do today, I challenge you to try this very same nutrition bar for yourselves.  Take a bite out of it and when you’re on the 2nd and 3rd chews, have your cell phone ready and take a quick selfie of your face and send it to me straight away.  I’d love to see the different facial contortions happening.

Take-Away Life Lesson:  If anything food-related looks and/or smells unusual to you, do yourself a favor and check out the ingredients list to see exactly what’s lurking deep within.

42 thoughts on “The Nastiest Nutrition Bar I’ve Ever Had”

  1. Haha! I bit into a “nutrition” bar like that once. I didn’t get any farther than the first bite. It said it was healthy but something that makes you want to immediately spit it out in self-defense …I don’t know….that’s just not healthy. 😉

  3. I tried some quite expensive and (supposedly famous) nutrition bars from Japan and it tasted like …
    With all due respect to Japanese folks, but they do have some very nasty nutrition bar! (which I think they like and buy a lot!)

  5. I’m a HUGE bar fan but there is no way I’m eating this! Trying too hard to be nutritious…too much potent greens!

    1. Yeah I’m all for being healthy, Angie, but you gotta be able to get it down. I’m sure there are plenty of people out there somewhere getting this bar down just fine surprisingly.

      1. Exactly, Cita! I just ate a tofu, banana, cocoa, omega 3 blend that some folks couldn’t get down but I love it! The best is when we find something that does work well for us 😀

    1. The health part of it seems like a great idea but the taste is quite another thing. How to get it down your mouth is the question? Lol.

  7. The title of this post made me chuckle, hon those ingredients with all their talk of roots and grass are for farm animals!! I am always a tad apprehensive of nutrition bars, they always taste a bit off, ‘forced’, ‘fake’- i cant describe it…maybe i haven’t just tasted the right one yet!!

    1. “Farm animals!” Lol! Never thought of it that way. There are a few nutrition bars that taste pretty good—it’s just a trial-and-error thing. 😉

    1. Lol. I still haven’t told her how awful it tasted to me. She may even read this post before I get a chance to tell her.

  14. Yuk ! So what did you say to your mum Loving ? Here, have a squishy, tasty, colourful, unhealthy donut my friend. 😀 xox <3

    1. Lol. I still haven’t even said anything to her about it yet. But, oh she’s gonna hear about it. Mark my words! Lol. 😀

  16. “blue-green algae” is an ingredient in that bar? That type of algae is not safe. And then there is “algae”. What species? Could be any kind of pond scum some of which are unsafe, too. Those two ingredients alone would make me not want to eat it.

      1. I don’t how healthy that blue-green algae could be. And there are too many bad tasting ingredients in the bars. They should keep it simple- nuts, fruit, toasted grains.

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